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Entered on: September 23, 2004 12:00 AM by Jackzilla
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Jessica Alba as the Invisible Woman!  
More Fantastic Four pics here:

PHOTO 138 - 22 Comments
From: Jackzilla Entered on: September 23, 2004 4:42 PM
Check out the site for pics of the rest of the cast!  
Reed Richards is younger-looking as expected. The Thing looks too much like a burn victim for my tastes. Johnny? Hey, at least we're not getting that robot from the cartoon series (remember that? because they thought kids would set themselves on fire if they saw the Human Torch?). Here's hoping this flick turns out cool! With the effects they can do now (after Spidey 2) and the cool powers of the FF it could be... (wait for it) ... SWEET!
From: The Bone Entered on: September 23, 2004 5:03 PM
Ah, finally the perfect role for Alba.
From: Ross Entered on: September 23, 2004 6:45 PM
I think this film will suck, for various reasons.

First, the Fantastic Four just aren't a compelling enough team or story to make a great movie.

Next, the cast pretty much sucks. Jessica Alba, while hot (to everyone but Bone), is inappropriate for Sue Storm.

As Jack said, The Thing doesn't look all that great - not much better than in that unreleased FF movie from 1994.

Reed Richards looks okay but too young and not like a superintelligent leader type.

Finally, Johnny Storm looks too much like fucking Reed Richards! What happened to the blond hair? If they can die Alba's hair blonde, and he's her brother, why can't he look like his comic book counterpart?

From: Jackzilla Entered on: September 25, 2004 10:09 AM
Hey! If done right the Fantastic Four could make a great movie! Are you kidding me, Ross?! The Thing? Dr. Doom? SWEET! Now, whether this movie can pull it out is anyone's guess -- who's even directing it? -- but the FF could be a killer movie.
From: Ross Entered on: September 25, 2004 12:36 PM
What I guess I'm saying is that I think it's too hard to make a FF movie "done right". I don't have a lot of faith in this team at all.
From: Swerb Entered on: September 26, 2004 10:45 PM
I'm unimpressed. In a word, lame.  
I did, however, dig Shaun of the Dead:
Plus, my rad interview with the guys who made/starred in it:
And, because I'm too lazy to find the other discussion thread, my Published Rehash of the Star Wars DVD:
And yes, Ross, I too find the word "pants" inherently funny.
From: Ross Entered on: September 27, 2004 9:10 AM
Awesome articles all, Swerb. I had forgotten you interviewed the Shaun of the Dead guys. What a great movie that is.  
And yes, for some reason, "pants" is hilarious and I too laughed our loud when Mark Hammill said that.
From: Jackzilla Entered on: September 27, 2004 1:19 PM
from the Shaun of the Dead interview:  
"The great thing about writing a scene like that is, you get to discuss an artist's career. I'm a big Prince fan, but even I would concede that the 'Batman' soundtrack was rubbish."  
Swerb - Clearly this is where you hand the conversation over to me: "Rubbish? 'Arms of Orion' definately. But 'Electric Chair' and 'Vicki Waiting' are SWEET! In fact, blah blah blah... "  
Was anyone else dissappointed with the second half of Shaun of the Dead? After starting out weird and funny it kinda became basic zombie movie stuff by the end.  
Talk about lame endings... *SPOILER ALERT!* anyone else seen The Forgotten yet? Good Lord! Again, promising start and held my interest for the first half and then it went all Spielberg-aliens-crapfest at the end!
From: Ross Entered on: September 27, 2004 2:03 PM
The second half of Shaun of the Dead was not as good as the first half, I agree - but it's still pretty funny. Overall, I still think the movie was well above average.  
Still haven't seen Sky Craptain yet.  
Oh shit! This weekend is Pearl Jam! Woohoo! Swerb, is your couch available Sunday night?
From: Swerb Entered on: September 27, 2004 3:02 PM
Jack, by all objective purposes, the Batman soundtrack is horrid. The music fits so poorly into the film, I even noticed how bad it was when I first saw it - and I was what, 14 years old?  
I think the second half of Shaun is completely redeemed by the coda at the end, which I won't give away to those who haven't seen it.  
Sky Craptain should make for an OK rental, Bert, but don't rush out and see it.  
And yes, my couch is open Sunday night. Been meaning to ask you that...
From: Jackzilla Entered on: September 27, 2004 8:51 PM
Swerb - Prince's Batman songs for the most part aren't even in the film (only "Partyman" and "Trust" are featured), so I don't know what kind of criticism "the music fits so poorly" is. Danny Elfman's score makes up the bulk of the actual soundtrack. There's several great tracks on Prince's Batman: "Electric Chair", "Vicky Waiting", "Scandalous." It's an average Prince album, for sure, but hardly horrid (or rubbish).  
Regardless: it was a funny reference in the movie! :)  
So Sky Craptain isn't worth seeing in the theater? Angie would go with some real prodding, but I don't wanna force the issue if it's not worth it. I gotta save those ANGIE PASSES for movies I REALLY want to see!
From: John Entered on: December 8, 2004 9:36 PM
I find myself oddly attracted to her hideous visage. As the Bone would point out it's one of my few faults. ;-)
From: Jackzilla Entered on: January 18, 2005 8:47 PM
The Fantastic Four site just launched...
From: Swerb Entered on: January 18, 2005 11:15 PM
I'm not too impressed with the FF trailer. Its use of a Perfect Circle remix is underwhelming. And TheThing looks kinda cheesy, and he's wearing pants! He doesn't wear pants, he wears superhero underoos!
From: The Bone Entered on: January 19, 2005 12:41 AM
Fuck the Fantastic Four trailer, watch this instead:  

From: Creeko Entered on: January 19, 2005 2:22 AM
I'ts nice to see that your time is well spent finding worthwhile educational videos with wholesome moral values.
From: Ross Entered on: January 19, 2005 7:09 AM
I will be forever scarred from watching that, you sick fuck.  
As for FF, I have an unblemished record of correctly predicting comic book movies' worth ahead of time, and the official verdict on Fantastic Four is that it will not be sweet. It will probably have some redeeming qualities and surprise us in a couple of marginal ways but overall will be underwhelming. Glad I could be of help.
From: Ross Entered on: January 22, 2005 11:20 AM
I will say this, after having seen the Fantastic Four trailer:  
It doesn't look as bad as I thought! The special effects at least are quite good and the Thing especially is quite sweet. I'm sure I'll hate the kid playing Johnny Storm even though seeing the Human Torch fly was pretty thrilling. I may have to slightly up my expectations a notch.
From: Swerb Entered on: April 1, 2005 5:25 PM
I'm sorry, but the new FF trailer looks like stank:
The dialogue sucks, and Dr. Doom looks totally gay. And the albino marmoset can't act worth a shite.
From: Ross Entered on: April 2, 2005 8:57 PM
I agree that the marmoset was stanky, but overall I have to say that it looks kind of fun. I will reserve judgement as usual, though. I've been burned by trailers too many damn times.
From: The Bone Entered on: April 2, 2005 9:21 PM
It looks exactly like an unwatchable turd.
From: Jackzilla Entered on: April 2, 2005 11:50 PM
I think it looks fun (the human torch falling then flaming on looks sweet) but the Thing still doesn't look right and Dr. Doom? He looks gay.

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