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I'm Voting Democrat Because...
Entered on: August 15, 2008 4:26 PM by Jackzilla

This is an e-mail a customer forwarded to me today:

I'm voting Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

I'm voting Democrat because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

I'm voting Democrat because when we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they're doing because they now think we're good people.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday CAN tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.

I'm voting Democrat because I'm not concerned about the slaughter of millions of babies so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as THEY see fit.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe three or four pointy headed elitist liberals need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would NEVER get their agendas past the voters.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that when the terrorists don't have to hide from us over there, when they come over here I don't want to have any guns in the house to fight them off with.

I'm voting Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my horse.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn't.

Makes ya wonder how anyone would EVER vote Democrat , now doesn't it?

NEWS 556 - 13 Comments
From: Jackzilla Entered on: August 15, 2008 4:30 PM

Wow.  How ignorant can you be?  Now, I certainly don't agree with everything the Democratic Party stands for, but anyone that thinks one party has all the answers is a fool (and part of the reason why George W. Bush, The Worst President In The History of the US, got into office).

Discuss?  I'd love to reply to this e-mail...


 
From: Ross Entered on: August 15, 2008 7:11 PM

Rather than take this idiot's reasons apart point by point (which would be fun but too time consuming), I'd rather just take away his right to vote if he actually believes this shit.  Which party supports that?  I'm voting for that one!


 
From: Ross Entered on: August 15, 2008 8:58 PM

Well, fuck it: I feel the need to deconstruct some of the more egregious ones:

I'm voting Democrat because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

Umm, I don't know what party he thinks he's talking about, but isn't it the Republicans, who, time and again, keep trying to pass amendments to ban flag burning?  This is just plain insane!

I'm voting Democrat because when we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they're doing because they now think we're good people.

I guess he also thinks Saddam was responsible for 9/11, too?

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday CAN tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.

This is probably the most offensive one to me, because it betrays not only a complete lack of understanding of science, but a lack of respect for it.  Predicting the short term weather is literally not possible (and I predict will never be possible, yes I know how that sounds but there is science to back that up) but identifying long-term trends is a completely different ballgame.  How this isn't obvious or at least cause to give pause is beyond me.

 

I'm voting Democrat because I believe three or four pointy headed elitist liberals need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would NEVER get their agendas past the voters.

Ah, now the name calling begins.  But again, this sounds more like Republicans than Democrats to me.  So some examples would be nice, here.

I'm voting Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my horse.

Really?  I mean, really?  This is an actual argument?

I'm voting Democrat because I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn't.

Well, honestly I can't argue with that one, except I think he has his numbers wrong.  The federal gas tax is around 4.5%.  If you factor in state taxes, which vary, it averages around 12%.  But I assume he is targeting Obama, who said he didn't support repealing the gas tax since the prices are so high - but Obama is entirely correct - it would be a stupid move.  Gas taxes largely pay for our roads.  Those who live in Michigan especially know how badly roads need to be kept in good repair.  But besides that, it just a bit of temporary and very minor relief that does nothing to address the actual problem.  I'm no big fan of taxes, but getting rid of the tax would do more harm than good.

 


 
From: NickNick Entered on: August 16, 2008 12:26 AM

You know what.  He's right.  I secretly want a bunch of crazy assholes to come over here and kill me and I also want to practice beastiality. 

Everyone knows that killing everyone in Iraq is the way to make the rest of the world stop hating us.  Everyone knows that killing "millions" of babies is in no way comparable to the billions slaughtered in wars caused by stupid religious values. 

Jackass.


 
From: John Entered on: August 16, 2008 3:05 AM
NickNick said:

You know what. He's right. I secretly want a bunch of crazy assholes to come over here and kill me and I also want to practice beastiality.

Everyone knows that killing everyone in Iraq is the way to make the rest of the world stop hating us. Everyone knows that killing "millions" of babies is in no way comparable to the billions slaughtered in wars caused by stupid religious values.

Jackass.

Holy shit man, I hope you're talking about in the history of the world and even then I'm not sure it would reach such proportions. Billions, you even went plural with it. That's an awfully big number there, Nick Nick.


 
From: Bunky Entered on: August 16, 2008 9:15 AM

That is a very big number. I believe it is estimated that 15 million people total were killed total in WWI, and 55 million people during WWII.


 
From: Ross Entered on: August 16, 2008 9:36 AM

...and neither one could be considered primarily driven by religion.  Granted, many people have died in the name of religion, but even a hardcore atheist like myself wouldn't claim it's the primary cause of war.  So yeah, I agree, billions is overstating things a bit.


 
From: Bunky Entered on: August 16, 2008 10:12 AM

The only war that comes to mind over religion is the Crusades.

Since the First Crusade started around 1009, and the world's population did not even hit 1 billion until 1804, I think it is safe to say that even if you added up all the Crusade wars, it came nowhere near 1 Billion.

No more Austin Powers for you Nick Nick....

 


 
From: Jackzilla Entered on: August 16, 2008 10:12 AM

A billion is a big fucking number.  Let's put it into perspective:

Exxon posted record profits last year of $40.61 billion.   Geesh, nothing "obscene" about that coming from an industry that's government subsidized and pays reduced corporate tax.


 
From: Ross Entered on: August 16, 2008 1:37 PM

A lot more people have died in the name of religion than just due to the Crusades.  But it's still nowhere near a billion. 


 
From: Bunky Entered on: August 16, 2008 8:34 PM

Agreed. The Crusades were the only wars that came to mind as a religion based war.


 
From: NickNick Entered on: August 16, 2008 9:00 PM

Holy fucking christ.  We're going to debate the B or the M?   The point was to ridicule the preposterous position of "millions of babies" dying but death row inmates being kept alive. 

My point is this:  Until the stupid ignorant bastards stop waiving their guns in the air and calling for the Middle East to be carpet bombed with nuclear weapons, they shouldn't be criticizing a woman's right.


 
From: BigFatty Entered on: August 17, 2008 3:36 AM
Jackzilla said:

A billion is a big fucking number. Let's put it into perspective:

Exxon posted record profits last year of $40.61 billion. Geesh, nothing "obscene" about that coming from an industry that's government subsidized and pays reduced corporate tax.

Yes, exactly!  And more people have eaten at McDonalds than have ever been killed in the name of religion.  We are talking billions AND billions served.  I think we can all agree that those numbers are extremely accurate.

Whats crazy... if you went to the bank and asked to withdraw 1 Billion dollars in quarters, they'd tell you NO!  It is a huge conspiracy.  The Bush Admin is keeping ordinary people from their money.  Thats why I am voting for H Ross Perot.  Write him in!!!!  If enough people do this, he will be the next president!


 

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