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Post X-mas rant
Entered on: January 13, 2006 9:38 PM by The Bone
Everything I want for Christmas I can buy on my own. I hate it when people by me shit like toasters and what not. It?s not like I?m looking a gift horse in the mouth, I just don?t have any use for the stuff. For example, Michelle bought me a George Forman grill (I already own one), a set of dishes (I own two motherfucking sets), a set of glass wear (I can open a fucking bar now since I already have a couple sets), a bathroom set (already own two sets). Now Michelle came to visit before my household goods arrived from Hawaii but she knew I had my shit coming. Now I have a goddamn warehouse full of fucking boxes to deal with.  
My parents always ask me what I want for Christmas or my birthday. I really don?t give a shit but it makes them feel better to get me something so I created an Amazon wish list for them. Guess what, I almost never get shit from my Amazon wishlist. For fuck sakes! Instead I get different shit from Amazon, like for example a book that my dad wants to read but I could give a fuck. I feel like an asshole but geez, just give some fucking money to charity in my name then if you aren?t going to get something I could actually use.  
It?s the thought that counts right? Well then I?m fucking insulted because there was no thought prior to unloading the merchandise on me. Am I an asshole? Yes of course but when I buy people shit I struggle for weeks trying to find something that they?ll actually use.  
Anyone else have this problem?  

NEWS 329 - 9 Comments
From: Jackzilla Entered on: January 13, 2006 11:18 PM
I'm sorry... what? I was busy eating Christmas chocolates... I love the holidays! I wish it were year round!
From: Ross Entered on: January 13, 2006 11:56 PM
Yes, I have the exact same problem. I'd just as soon forgo the entire Christmas gift-buying song and dance. If you want to get a gift for someone at anytime during the year, do it. I see no reason to struggle to come up with gifts that you would otherwise not give a person.  
I like the idea behind it all, I really do. It's just that most people have poor execution - myself included. I guess I'd rather just let the kids have fun with it and pretty much keep the adults out of the charade of reliving their childhood memories of getting gifts - I don't get to play with GI Joes anymore (dammit), so what's the point?
From: BigFatty Entered on: January 14, 2006 10:26 AM
Xmas gifts - fuck em! Years ago my family decided that the stress of searching out a meaningful gift was way too much and having it required was bullshit. We opted for not buying any gifts for each other, but said we should buy ourselves something nice. It works out great! This year was perfect! All I got was a $200 Best Buy gift card. Small, compact and very usable. I don't want anything. I have enough shit cluttering up my life. I'd rather have people come and take shit away!  
I also hate all the food that is around! Good lord, the office is a dumping ground for all the shit people are too guilty to eat. As strong as I try to be, I tend to eat a bunch of shit I don't want. But, I am just as crappy as the next guy. I will bring in goodies I receive so I am not eating them all by myself at home.  
They really need to re-purpose Xmas. I want the time off, the time with family and friends, but that is it. The gluttony, the gifts, all that is bullshit!
From: The Bone Entered on: January 14, 2006 10:29 AM
I think I'm going to start giving asswhoopings for Christmas.
From: Swerb Entered on: January 14, 2006 4:50 PM
Yeah, well, I have to grin and bear it every year when the in-laws come over for Xmas. Let's see what great gifts I've received... a crappy shirt once (didn't fit), another time a Wolverine/Hush Puppies T-shirt, and once I asked my (then future) father-in-law for some of those kickass pickles he cans every year, and got canned tomatoes (ick) and pumpkin (ick again) along with 'em. The worst one was last year, when I got a chess set comprised of mini shot glasses for the pieces. Huh? It looked like some piece of crap ordered out of Parade magazine or something. This year, I got a men's "manicure set" with nail clippers and teeny scissors with a bunch of shit I'll never use in a faux-leather carrying case - even Stacy said, "They must have thought, well, John is, you know, a guy, so we'll get him this." It still had the Wal-Mart tag on it, so it's going right back, although enduring the fatty parade at that place may not be worth it.  
And what did we buy my in-laws this year? A digital camera. Just goes to show you, what goes around, comes around to kick you in the ass.
From: Ross Entered on: January 15, 2006 11:42 AM
The Fatty Parade - I love it!
From: Swerb Entered on: January 15, 2006 9:44 PM
Well, every time I go to Wal-Mart (which isn't often, trust me), it's a whole bunch of fuckin' crap merchandise piled up in the aisles, and you can't get through because 90% of their clientele is Cheeto-eatin', pancake-stuffin', super-sized lardasses who have their own orbits. Fuck that place!
From: BigFatty Entered on: January 15, 2006 10:15 PM
Thats right! Shop Meijer you Beeyotches and pay my paycheck!  
Meijer where smiles are always in stock.  
Meijer where the smiles are always free!  
Meijer, we accept cash, checks, credit cards, or small children.
From: Swerb Entered on: January 16, 2006 3:55 PM
I spend enough money at Meijer to keep you well stocked in burgers and Xboxes, Fatty, so don't you worry.

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