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Entered on: May 14, 2003 7:25 PM by The Bone
Would you rather have your arm pinned against an imovable rock, with only a dull knife with which you could amputate your arm or a locked steel collar around your neck chained to an automobile driving at exactly 6.5 mph for 6 hrs?

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From: Ross Entered on: May 15, 2003 2:07 PM
1) Where is the car driving? On the beach, on dirt road, on a city street, over jagged glass, etc?  
2) Can I grab the chain? If so, can I wear gloves?  
3) What am I wearing?  
4) Do I have time to prepare for this test, or is it NOW?  
Even in the best case scenario of all of these, the answer is probably to still saw your own arm off. Of course, if you're using that recent news story as your inspiration for it, you're most likely as good as dead anyway. In that guy's case, his bones were broken already and it was a relatively easy job. Other stories I've read of people having limbs trapped and bones not crushed, nearly all of them failed, if only from passing out from the pain. It's not something that you're likely to pull off even under the best of circumstances.
From: The Bone Entered on: May 15, 2003 8:29 PM
1) Car is driving down an asphalt road in Alabama. Sporadic potholes, cool spring breeze.  
2) No gloves, you can grab the chain all you want.  
3) You got jogging shoes, shorts, and a t-shirt, underwear, and socks.  
4) test is now, however your arm will be pinned without being broken.
From: Ross Entered on: May 16, 2003 12:01 AM
Yeah, under those circumstances, I'm dead if I try to run. I assume that while I'm pinned under the rock I'm stranded somewhere where no one will find me? Yeah, I'll take my chances with my arm. 6 hours is highly unrealistic for someone such as myself.
From: The Bone Entered on: May 16, 2003 3:17 AM
What about 5 mph?
From: Ross Entered on: May 16, 2003 8:52 AM
No. Since I've been on the treadmill a bit lately, I am aware of my limitations. I think my threshold for this one is around a sluggish 3.5 mph. At this rate, I can walk for a long period of time. My belief here is that as soon as you start to falter, it's all over. I need a nice zone of padding.
From: John Entered on: May 16, 2003 12:45 PM
Unfortunately, I have to go with Bert on this one. I simply do not have the stamina to go even 5 mph for 6 hours. For me 6.5 mph is a brisk jog as pitiful as that is. On the treadmill I've gone 7 mph, but only for 8 minutes and that was enough for me. I too would have to take my chances with my arm pinned under a rock.  
As for jogging around Reeds Lake, I'm fairly sure that would kick my ass BAD. I may not even be up for that task. Sorry Bone, you might be going solo.
From: Ross Entered on: May 16, 2003 1:16 PM
I think I will attempt the Reeds run if it happens. I probably wont keep up with Bone but I will try my hand at at least completing the mission. How far is it, anyhow?
From: John Entered on: May 16, 2003 1:40 PM
It's 4.5 miles inundated with hills with one hill that seems to go on for a half mile. The last time you ran it you were in pretty good running shape and you admitted it was the worst thing you ever did. The first time I attempted it I had been running several miles a day on a track. The first 3 miles were not to bad. Then as we came around a bend the Bone asked how I was feeling, in reply I said great. The Bone just smiled knowingly. As we rounded the bend there was a semi-steep hill which at first did not make any impression on me. After a while I began to notice this hill was going on for what seemed forever. Finally as we rounded the finale curve at the top of the hill the Bone asked how do you feel now, my reply "FUCK YOU ASSHOLE". We had just 1.5 miles to go which I barely managed. I never fully recovered from that hill during my first run around Reeds. After several runs around Reeds I was able to adapt to the sheer shittiness of this venture. I assure you it makes a treadmill look like pussy work. So go ahead and try your hand at it Bert and good luck.
From: The Bone Entered on: May 16, 2003 3:15 PM
That hill is an ass kicker. I love it because it is perfectly positioned to fuck you up. You are cruising along for a few miles and you think everything is going great, then all of a sudden you are engaged in an uphill battle (literally). Afterwards, you still have an decent amount left in the run which forces you to really dig deep.  
One of the most heinous physical events was when I ran around Reeds lake with Delmonte Fruitcake. It started out as a nice run at a decent pace, however as we progressed along Delmonte (being the gifted athelete that he was) kept increasing the pace, trying to lose me. After the hill, I actually started slipping behind. This was highly unacceptable for me, given my competative nature. For a fleeting moment I almost gave up and abandoned the idea of keeping up because it was too painful. Then it occurred to me that I would rather have my heart explode out of my chest than let a little turd like Fruitcake beat me. I picked up the pace on the last mile and caught up to the little fucker with about a half mile left. We hung together at a blistering pace (probably around 9mph) until the last quater mile. At that point, Fruitcake lit the afterburners and stated sprinting. He underestimated my resolve however, beacause I matched his pace step for step. That last quarter mile was an all out sprint that I was determined not to lose, even if it meant having a heart attack. About a hundred yards from the end, Fruitcake stopped dead in his tracks and vomitted all over the pace. I laughed all the way to the end.  
The point of this story is that given the mental resolve, the human body is capable of much more than what you think. It's only a matter of enduring physical discomfort. Also, one day after only running for a half hour at a time, I ran for 3 straight hours at about 5.5 mph. Although it sucked, I think I would take the car at 5mph even up to 6mph because I know my body is physically capable, and 6hrs is only a matter of overcoming the discomfort in my mind. Plus, the arm pinned under the rock is your whacking arm, and I can't be losing that.
From: Ross Entered on: May 16, 2003 3:31 PM
Well, perhaps I'll be in for more than I bargained for. I don't have a lot more time to prepare.  
But I find that in my old age, you don't have to worry so much about the physical pain of the moment, as you do with permanently injuring yourself. For instance my dad injured the arch of his foot running and it eventually led to him stopping playing tennis competitively. I don't need to get crippled on a run around a damn lake for no real reason.
From: John Entered on: May 16, 2003 3:31 PM
All I'm saying is don't underestimate the shittiness of this run. As I said before, I was running almost every day and it still whupped my ass.
From: Ross Entered on: May 20, 2003 8:04 AM
I underestimated. I realize now that I could not run around Reed's Lake unless I was moving at a very sluggish pace. Furthermore, the idea of 6 hours at 6.5mph is sheer lunacy. Last night on the treadmill, I could only run at 6.5 for stretches of 5 or 6 minutes at a time before I wanted to go back to walking for another 5 minutes. I suck.

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